Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christkwannukahnaliativus--you can figure it out.

So, here it is, Christmas, AGAIN!

It's been a wild and wooly (well, wooly for me is considerably, like, thinner than it used to be) year.  Lotsa good stuff has happened, but I can't remeber what it was!

Life here in Upstate NY is interesting.  We had a late start to summer and then a long, lingering fall.  We've had less than 2 inches of snow the last I heard.  Usually by this time we're up to our butts in the white (well, okay, gray) stuff and not having picked up all the junk in the yard doesn't seem like that much of an issue.  It's been pretty warm (relatively speaking), only getting as low as the single digits once or twice--it's currently about 30 degrees @ 7:45 AM. 

The house is slowly getting to the point where it looks like a house.  I could show you some pikchoors, but I don't want to scare anybody!

Buddy The Wonder Dog, my new roommate is currently sleeping under a nice warm fleece, on the rocking chair which is about 3 feet away from the pellet stove.  He's snug as a bug in a rug and I'm sure he's dreaming about the squirrels that he can never catch in meatspace.  Pretty soon, we'll go out for a Christmas Constitutional and he'll be checking every tree, shrub, utility pole and guy and any people moving too slowly to escape, to see if his property markers are still in good order.  Then we'll come home and he'll have his breakfast of roast beef, sweet potatoes, rice and green beans while I enjoy my special Christmas Gruel ( the same ol', same ol', oatmeal with craisins, pecans & maple syrple).  Then we'll sit around till lunchtime when I will have some roast beef, sweet potatoes, rice and green beans AND some more special Christmas Gruel (but in honor of the day, it will be flambeed with a cup of Everclear and a soupcon of Dr. McGillicuddy's peppermint schnapps).  Buddy will be havin' teh kibble.

In years past I have written "humorous" Christmas letters, chock-full-o-nuttiness, about the fictional goings on of various celebrities and politicians.  I was thinking about doing that this year, but due to a shortage of the Rumnog and my Muse's having run off with the UPS guy, I was unable to conjure up the requisite imagery.  I suggest, instead, that you simply google "GOP primary" or watch a marathon of those "Hollywood" exposee thingies.  I cannot (at least in the last 30 years) take enough illicit substances to conjure up the sorts of fiction that is, in fact, fact out there in LAlaland and down in D.C.

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas (if that's what floats your boat) or other holiday festiveissnees.  I look forward to visiting as many of you as possible in the next year--and I WILL be travelling with Buddy (he's got an Amex Black!) so get out the guest waterbowl!

Cheers and warmest regards from your favorite uncle/peace loving dope.